Scared Mode

It’s so nice being able to type on a keyboard rather than thumbing away at a screen. I’ve transitioned into writing my blogs with a different “notepad” on my laptop to prepare for the website launch. I’m still very excited about it.

My cat escaped the closet “safe room” that I created for him. I didn’t make it completely safe, I guess. My mother keeps informing me that this cat isn’t going to give love as easily as the previous cats. It’s a traumatized cat, therefore it needs my love. I’m completely on the fence about whether to keep it or not. They don’t give refunds so I don’t know what I’ll do, but I bought him on Sunday and it’s Tuesday and he hasn’t warmed up. Like, at all. He’s still in scared mode, like I’ve beaten him or something. I feel bad. I have other cats in the home, one that wants to play, and a child that is mega curious about a new animal. I feel like a failure, getting into something I have no business doing. I didn’t have these feelings about the orange one or the gray kitten. I certainly never have these types of feelings with Ramsay, but I got him as a kitten. Of course, kitten season is upon us shortly so I should have just waited. I think I’ll call the humane society tomorrow and just ask them what I should do since he’s hiding all the time. I can make myself sound like the bad guy: never home, kid is too loud, other animals take precedence. I really feel like I should. He doesn’t bring me joy and I know it’s early, but that doesn’t matter. I dread coming home and having to be patient and gentle. I just want an animal to love me and that’s not going to happen with this cat.