Everything All At Once

Mood:

Listening to: Subtronics’s Nitrous Mafia

Today marks one month of sobriety. It would have been eight months had I not been so selfish and out of my mind but whatever. I’m humbly celebrating 31 days of sobriety while working at a vineyard. Wtf is wrong with me? The money is good and it gives me time to spend with Viv as well as work on an “anchor skill” such as Accounting. Anyway, it’s easy to say no (today anyway) because I know what happens after one little sip: chaos. Uncontrollable drinking, a downward spiral into a dark and damp abyss that smells like a cellar.

I’m going Camping tomorrow. Not sure that I’m going to necessarily enjoy it but it’s something to do. And it’s an escape from the heat. It was almost canceled, by golly, but I got a text later saying that it’s been “a day” and that it’s still happening. So I’m packing. I’m glad that I’m taking my car so I can stuff it full of the things I need without burdening everyone. They’re bringing a lot of food, but of course I have preferences and I drink an insane amount of sparkling water so I’m bringing a twelve pack at least. I found some glow necklaces and needed a new toothbrush and toothpaste… it was a cheap excuse to go shopping. I had an impulse and was hurried since I only had fifteen minutes until they locked the doors. With tomorrow opening up, I’m going to find some glow sticks and maybe some binoculars. Also smores supplies. You can’t go camping without eating smores.

Work was horrendous today. I was assigned to float everywhere but ultimately was tethered to the patio. It was the hottest day of the year to date and I was outside, in the misters. It was SO busy. Like CRAZY busy. It drove me a little batty. Then, I had to move inside to cover someone that was leaving around 6pm and it was just one thing after another. I never had a chance to recover from the heat and collect myself before transitioning to the inside. I royally messed up on an employee’s graduation dinner with her father. I got so busy that I forgot to put their appetizers in. AND they ordered some wine pairings with their entrees and of course, I was too slammed to bring them on time so I ended up comped them. It was hectic and I feel like everyone around me is moving with purpose and knows what to do whereas I’m still gleaning what is socially acceptable to be doing at certain times of the day. I decided to call out for tomorrow. I’m overstimulated and want to just start this camping adventure already. Also, I worked an event on Thursday so my usual three day work week has been friggin’ dragging and I’ve put a stop to it.