Scuffle of Feelings

Is my job a good career? Yes. 

Is my career a thankless career? No, it shouldn’t be.

Do I wish I had a better team to coordinate with? Absolutely. 

Including my manager? Yep.

There are five birthday parties scheduled today and my boss showed up fifteen minutes before hand just in the nick of time to take the glory for the set up and the pizzas and basically putting it together when in reality, all she did was charge their card (that I took from the customer) and create an invoice/receipt that she may or may not have email them. If I had access to the system to create invoices and charge cards, I wouldn’t even need to bother her. I’d be flying solo. The idiot who we SHOULD HAVE fired actually showed up yesterday where he receive two write-ups, for attendance and not following the calling-in procedure. I wish he hadn’t shown up because if he didn’t show, we could have fired him. Now I have to put up with his unreliable ass. I’m not vouching for young people anymore during the interview process. No more. Young people are unreliable and treat this place like it means nothing to anybody when in fact, it means a lot to a lot of people, including me. I want things to be semi-perfect and for people to help out. Is that too much to bloody ask?? Helping out, thinking a little ahead, looking around for what they can do next. Have a bloody sense of urgency! That’s what I want from my team: a sense of urgency and I don’t want to have to be a bitch to get it. How do I even begin to tell my boss that I’m disappointed with her “help”? I’m sure the switch could flip again and she would go all corporate on my ass like before. I haven’t been written up for attendance issues, even during the Christmas craze where I was, no joke, sometimes an hour and a half late to work. I was at home, crying and swearing and smoking, trying to calm myself down enough to get over my fears and go to work. Life was different back then. 

But damn.

I’m so disappointed. Fifteen minutes before the parties. What if idiotface didn’t show up and I was really, really behind? She didn’t text me but neither did I. I like my job but I don’t like my team. From the bottom all the way to the top. I wish I could work for HR. I’d never spill the tea. 

During this whole scuffle of feelings, I’ve decided to get out of my department by any means necessary. I’ve consulted with Thomas, my AI agent, and put together a really nice proposal. I’d like to assist HR by being the Employee Engagement Coordinator.